How the Christmas Story is a Special Needs Story

by jphilo | Dec 14, 2022 | Different Dream, Encouragement, Holidays, Uncategorized

How the Christmas Story is a Special Needs Story

How the Christmas story is a special needs story is something guest blogger Mark Arnold is thinking about this time of year. What he has to say will help you see how Emmanuel, God with us, is with caregiving families in a deep and meaningful way.

Every year we hear the Christmas story of Mary and Joseph heading to Bethlehem, of the innkeeper, angels, shepherds, wise men, and of course the baby Jesus. Have you ever looked at it as a metaphor for special needs families? Here’s a look at how this story parallels the story of parents of children with special needs or disabilities.

Unexpected news

Mary is visited by the angel Gabriel who tells her that she will have a very special child. This surprised Mary. She was ‘greatly troubled at his words’ before she accepted his message and said, “May it be to me as you have said.” (Luke 1:26-38)

For the families of children with special needs, unexpected news can arrive during a pre-natal scan. It can be troubling, devastating even. Not every parent accepts the news as Mary did. For some who learn their child will not survive or will be significantly disabled, parents grieve all that their child might have been.

A different location

Mary and Joseph traveled to Bethlehem for the census. Joseph, belonging to the house and line of David, had to register with Mary in Bethlehem, the town of David. (Luke 2:1-5)

Places where a baby with pre-birth concerns can be delivered may be limited. This might require a journey to an unfamiliar town. Though the trip won’t involve a ride on a donkey, it may still be a difficult journey.

Unexpected kindness

Mary needed somewhere safe to give birth to her baby in Bethlehem. Although there are no rooms available for them to stay in the inn, the innkeeper allowed them to use the stable, and the newborn baby was placed in the animals’ manger. (Luke 2:6-7)

Families of children born with special needs or a disability often mention one person who brought a cup of tea and a kind word during an overwhelming medical crisis. A simple act of kindness transformed their profoundly challenging situation into something a little more bearable.

Strangers

A bunch of shepherds turned up shortly after Mary gave birth. Goodness knows what she thought about this, exhausted as she was. Still Luke’s Gospel says that “Mary treasured up all these things and pondered them in her heart.” (Luke 2:8-20) Later, wise men or Magi from the East brought gifts and wanted to see the baby. (Matthew 2:1-12)

Families like ours get used to the arrival of strangers with impressive lists of medical and social care credentials, professionals involved in the care and support of the child and their family. We also ponder the support and care the professionals provide and wonder what the future holds for our child.

Hateful people

Mary and Joseph were warned that Jesus was in danger and fled to Egypt. King Herod ordered the death of all boys under two years old in the Bethlehem area, but was too late to catch Jesus and his family. (Matthew 2:13-18)

There are people today who do not understand or accept children with special needs or disabilities. They do and say hateful things. Some believe babies with special needs or disabilities should be euthanized. Families who encounter these views find them hurtful.

Home

Mary, Joseph, and Jesus eventually returned and set up a home in Nazareth near Galilee. It was Jesus’ earthly home during most of his life. (Matthew 2:19-23)

Many families of children born with special needs or disabilities wait a long time to bring their child home. Some never make it. Those who do come home to a different future than originally envisaged. Still it is a future that can be wonderful.

Seeing how the Christmas story is a special needs story can help us live more fully knowing that Jesus, God with us, and his parents experienced the challenges, and struggles we and other families face each day.

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Photo by Gareth Harper on Unsplash

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Mark Arnold is the Additional Needs Ministry Director at Urban Saints, a leading national Christian children’s and youth organization. He is co-founder of the Additional Needs Alliance, a national and international advocate for children and young people with additional needs or disabilities. Mark is a Churches for All and Living Fully Network partner, a member of the Council for Disabled Children and the European Disability Network. He writes an additional needs column for Premier Youth and Children’s Work (YCW) magazine and blogs at The Additional Needs Blogfather. He is father to James, who has autism spectrum condition, associated learning disability, and epilepsy. To find out more about how Mark’s work can help you, contact him at: marnold@urbansaints.org or @Mark_J_Arnold

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Why Is Expressing Gratitude Especially Important for Families with Disabilities?

Why is expressing gratitude especially important for families with disabilities? Guest blogger Kristin Faith Evans shares three compelling reasons that can lead you to true expressions of gratitude as the holiday season draws near.

It’s that time of year. The chilly air mixes with autumn scents and rustling fallen leaves. The holidays are quickly approaching, bringing with them all of their memories and emotional implications. During this season, many people talk about the blessings for which they’re most thankful. But the holidays can be challenging and elicit painful emotions for some families. So why is expressing gratitude especially important for families when disabilities in what can be a difficult season? Here are three reasons that are important in our family.

Reason #1: Gratitude makes us more resilient

Studies show that when caregivers practice daily gratitude, they report a higher quality of life and better health outcomes. Focusing on ways that we are thankful can give us a more balanced perspective on our circumstances. Expressing gratitude opens our eyes to appreciate different aspects of our lives that we can miss when we’re focused on our difficulties and loss.

Regularly practicing gratitude can also improve our mental health. Taking time to reflect on our blessings and giving thanks helps lower our stress levels and increases our hope and joy.

Try this: Each day, write down one thing for which you are grateful.

Reason #2: Expressing gratitude deepens our faith

Sometimes it can be difficult to identify something for which we are thankful. During painful seasons of loss and grief, anger can build, and we can feel disconnected from God. Choosing something very simple to thank God for can help us see other ways we can express prayers of gratitude.

Try this: When you’re having difficulty identifying something specific to thank God for, recite the verses written below.

“It is good to give thanks to the Lord, to sing praises to your name, O Most High” (Psalm 92:1).
“Oh give thanks to the Lord, for he is good, for his steadfast love endures forever!” (Psalm 107:1).
“I will give thanks to the Lord with my whole heart; I will recount all of your wonderful deeds” (Psalm 9:1).
“Therefore, as you received Christ Jesus the Lord, so walk in him, rooted and built up in him and established in the faith, just as you were taught, abounding in thanksgiving” (Colossians 2:6).
“Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you” (1 Thessalonians 5:18).

Reason #3: Expressing gratitude strengthens our relationships and family functioning

Studies show that expressing gratitude to others, especially to our significant others, can greatly improve our relationships. Telling someone why you appreciate them and thanking them for something that they have done can increase connection and forgiveness. In times of stress, these stronger relationships help hold the family together giving everyone more support.

Try this: Attach a piece of poster board or a large sheet of paper to your kitchen wall or fridge. Encourage family members and friends to write down someone or something for which they are thankful each day.

What’s one way that you express gratitude? Share your ideas in the comments section.

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All Scripture references are from the ESV translation.
Photo by Marcos Paulo Prado on Unsplash

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Kristin lives with her husband, Todd, and their two children in the Nashville, TN area. She is an author, speaker, mental health counselor, and a mom of two children with rare genetic disorders and complex needs. Her greatest passion is teaming up with her husband to empower other parents of children with disabilities, mental health disorders, and medical complications. She hopes that you may find encouragement and support on their website www.DisabilityParenting.com.