9 Ways to Start the School Year Well

by jphilo | Aug 9, 2018 | Different Dream, School/Education, Special Needs Parenting

9 Ways to Start the School Year Well

School will soon begin around the country. During my 25 years as a teacher, the parents who used some or all of these 9 tips helped their kids with special needs start the school year on a positive note.

Tip #1: Stick to the School Supply List

Purchase exactly what’s on the school supply list and nothing more. Glitzy, fancy versions of items on the list often create distractions in the classroom. Plus they tend to be more expensive, and who needs that? Filling the school supply list costs enough already.

Tip #2: Start the School Schedule 1–2 Weeks Ahead of Time

Implement school bedtimes, wake up times, breakfast time, and lunch time at least 1–2 weeks before school starts so kids are ready for the school routine. As bodies adapt to set meal times, they are better able to adjust to the school bathroom break schedule.

Tip #3: Develop a Positive Mindset about School

Kids base their attitudes about school and teachers on what they observe in their parents, so you need to develop a positive mindset. Try out these statements to stay positive about school and teachers:

Educators are people, just like you. You are more alike than different from one another.
Most teachers are in education because they care about kids. If they were in it for the money, they would have chosen a different career path.

Even if my school years were negative, my child’s can be positive. In other words, don’t let your bad memories color your child’s life.

Tip #4: Cultivate a Spirit of Cooperation, Not of Confrontation

While parents of kids with special needs must advocate for their children, advocacy works best when parents and educators cooperate. Therefore, start the new year with cooperation. Treat teachers and administrators as members of your child’s team and see what happens. If they cooperate by following your child’s IEP and suggesting appropriate goals during revisions, do a happy dance. If not, move toward confrontation slowly and calmly. You really can catch more flies with honey than with vinegar.

Tip #5: Take Your Child to Visit a New School Ahead of Time

Call the school secretary (Who, BTW, along with the custodian, knows more about what’s happening at school than the administrator or anyone else) to schedule a visit. The secretary will know when the school is open, what door to enter, and whether or not the floor wax is dry.

Tip #6: Call the Teacher Ahead of Time for a Visit with Your Child
A casual drop in visit to meet the teacher before school starts may seem like a good idea, but the weeks before school starts are often filled with faculty meetings and trainings. Teachers who have children in day care need advance warning to make arrangement with their providers. So call the teacher ahead of time to be sure the meeting is a go.

Tip #7: Practice Meeting the Teacher

Once the meeting with the teacher is set up, do some role play with your child. Explain how you will introduce him to the teacher and how the child should respond. If your child is verbal, practice small talk about summer vacation and asking the teacher about hers. If your child has a communication device, practice using it. This will facilitate interaction between your child and the teacher before the noisy and crowded first day of school.

Tip #8: Set Up a Communication Method

Some parents can address this during the teacher visit described above if the child can wait calmly across the room. (Bring something for your child to do while you quietly talk to the teacher.) Otherwise, offer to send an email, to arrange a time for a call, or to set up a second visit to discuss a way to communicate regarding your child. This is essential if your child is non-verbal or is verbal, but not a reliable messenger.

Tip #9: Make Reasonable Requests

Your child’s teacher is responsible for the education and well-being of every child in the class, and each child deserves an equal portion of her time, energy, and attention. Therefore, if you are requesting something beyond what’s in your child’s IEP or 504 plan, be sure your request is reasonable. If your child needs more support than his or her present placement and IEP provides, ask for a meeting with the educational team about increased services. The team, not the teacher, has the power to authorize changes in services and placements.

Our kids with special needs deserve a positive start to the the school year. Hopefully, these 9 ideas will help you partner with the school system to make it happen!

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Jolene Philo is a published author, speaker, wife, and mother of a son with special needs.

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A Unique Back to School Perspective

Janae Copeland is an educator and parent of 2 daughters with special needs. As she and her husband, a school administrator, and their children prepare to begin a new school year.

A Unique Back to School Perspective

I’m an elementary music teacher in the school my youngest two children attend. My husband is also a teacher and now serves as a middle school assistant principal. He also has the unique perspective of having been a student with an IEP throughout his public-school career. Our oldest daughter, who has had a 504 plan since 3rd grade, is now an 11th grader, and our youngest daughter has an IEP. Here are truths we have learned from our unique back to school perspective.

#1: The IEP Process Is Daunting for Everyone at the Table

Before I was a parent, I participated in many IEP meetings as a teacher. It was hard understand some of the decisions and strategies discussed for students. I wanted the best for my students and if my idea of “best” didn’t match the stated outcomes, I experienced internal frustration. Fast forward and my husband and I were headed into our youngest daughter’s initial IEP placement meeting when she turned 3. We’d both been around the table before as educators, but I hadn’t anticipated the difficulty, anxiety, and emotional drain of the process as parents. I wasn’t sure we were being heard or understood. I worried about over-reacting and was concerned that the services suggested weren’t going to be enough. I was on the verge of tears and utterly exhausted. I felt immediate empathy for the parents who had been around the IEP table with me in the past, many of whom faced much deeper challenges than we could imagine,

Through this experience, I learned the IEP process is hard for the parents, for teachers, for the specialists and for the administrators. Each person comes with their own perspective and piece of the puzzle. The pieces don’t always fit easily. Some get thrown to the side, though they are pivotal to the image being created. It takes time, effort and patience to figure out the picture. If everyone at the table maintains an open mind and listens to each perspective, the pieces will come together. It will still be hard, it will still take time, and the outcomes may not match what everyone wants. But if the focus remains on the child, all turn out well.

#2: Teachers and Staff Want What’s Best for Your Child

As parents, it’s easy to walk into every school meeting feeling like you are your child’s defender in a great battle. While you are our child’s best advocate, I can assure you that the other people in the room are advocating for your child, too. You know your kid best, but educators also know your child in a different way. They see a side of your child that only an educator who spends hours every day with them can. As a teacher in my child’s school I knowing how much her teachers are invested in her success. I see first hand how they relate to my child and other students in the classroom each day. If every person involved in the child’s education approaches meetings with a mindset of mutual trust and shared goals, conversations can not only be pleasant, but also extremely productive and beneficial.

#3: Every Child Is a Special Needs Child

As cliché as it sounds, I have found this to be true year after year. There are measurable, legal difference in students considered to special needs and neuro-typical students. But, there are as many variations in these categories as there are students in each classroom. Even neuro-typical students have needs teachers have to address. Needs range from anxiety to traumas, from effects of poverty to social challenges, from parental absence to behavioral challenges. I make this point as a reminder that teachers work constantly to meet everyone’s needs. They should be given grace and support as they work to make sure your child, and every child, is successful.

As we head into the 2018-19 school year, I hope these thoughts will shape your back to school perspective. My prayer is that all special needs children and the teachers blessed to work them will have a successful and fulfilling school year!

Do you like what you see at DifferentDream.com? You can receive more great content by subscribing to the quarterly Different Dream newsletter and signing up for the daily RSS feed delivered to your email inbox. You can sign up for the first in the pop up box and the second at the bottom of this page.

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Janae Copeland is a wife and mother of 3 daughters. She lives in Jacksonville, NC where she is a K-5 music educator. She became a Different Dream mom when her oldest daughter, Jayda, was born in 2002 with hydrocephalus and cerebral palsy. Nine years later, her daughter Clark was born with EA/TEF and right microtia/atresia. Janae is grateful to have been entrusted with the care all 3 of her special daughters and seeks out opportunities to help other young mothers who may need support as they begin these same journeys with their own blessings from God.