Special Needs Ministry: Meet Michael’s Village

by jphilo | Jul 16, 2014 | Different Dream, Special Needs Ministry, Spiritual Support

Special Needs Ministry: Meet Michael’s Village

Our post for the day comes from guest blogger Susie Stefonowich. After reading Karen Jackson’s post about her daughter’s confirmation, Stefonowich submitted this piece about a young man in the parish where she and her husband lead an ecumenical special needs ministry.

Special Needs Ministry: Meet Michael’s Village

I truly began to appreciate the saying “It takes a village” when Michael, a man who experiences cognitive disabilities and attends our church, asked to become Catholic. His roommate, Max, a man who experiences Down Syndrome is a Fourth degree Knight in the Knights of Columbus. Therefore Michael knew what being a Knight meant and wanted to join. However, he was told he needed to be Catholic to do this.

Special Needs Ministry and Kits from Loyola Press

After contacting Michael’s family in North Carolina, we found that he had never been baptized. So, baptism is where we began. There is not a written curriculum for an adult with cognitive disabilities to become Catholic, so we needed to develop one for Michael. We decided to use kits produced by Loyola Press as our guide. These kits were developed for children who experience autism, but are helpful with anyone with cognitive disabilities.

Michael’s Special Needs Ministry Village

My husband and I assumed we would sponsor Michael, but then 2 people volunteered to sponsor him. Amazing, as sometimes its difficult finding sponsors for persons who do not experience disabilities. Michael had two without even asking! So began Michael’s Village.

Since Michael was not raised in the Catholic Church, we began teaching him how to bless himself with the sign of the cross. This was difficult for him as some of his motor skills are limited. Also, he had difficulty remembering exactly how it should be done. Immediately after we met on Sunday mornings and before mass started, he walked up to everyone and said, “Look!” and then attempted to do the sign of the cross. We tried to be there and explain, “Michael is learning the sign of the cross.” They began to help him….so more villagers.

From January until Mother’s Day, we and Michael’s sponsors worked with him on Sunday mornings. Once we set the date for his baptism, he invited everyone. Every Sunday, after class, he walked up to anyone and everyone and told them he was going to be baptized. Then he called one of us to give the specific details. He would say, “I want you to come!” More villagers, as many said they would be there.

Michael was baptized on Mother’s Day 2014 with many of his friends and his family from North Carolina in attendance. He was so excited and so spontaneous, he affected everyone who was there. Michael’s innocence and sincerity showed our entire parish of over 1200 families how wonderful and simple God’s love truly is.

Michael’s Special Needs Ministry Village Continues to Grow

Michael’s village grows weekly. We will continue helping to prepare him to receive his other sacraments (Eucharist and Confirmation), and in the near future he will accomplish his dream of becoming a Knight of Columbus. My husband and I, along with his other sponsors all agree, that Michael has taught us much more than we could ever teach him about God’s love.

Your Special Needs Ministry Success Story?

Do you have questions or comments for Susie? Leave them in the comment box. Or leave a shout out about the good things happening in the special needs ministry at your church.

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Susie Stefonowich worked as a pediatric nurse at the Children’s Hospital in Norfolk, VA for 38 years. She is also the parish advocate at Church of the Holy Family in Virginia Beach, Virginia. She and her husband coordinate The Chosen Ministry, an ecumenical special needs ministry. They are the parents of Colleen, who 29 years ago was born 12 weeks prematurely. Colleen has some cognitive disabilities which led to the Stefonowichs’ involvement in the special needs community. God works in mysterious ways!

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The Joy of Special Needs Inclusion and Confirmation

Karen and her daughter Samantha

Special needs inclusion is a passion for today’s guest blogger Karen Jackson. She’s the director of the Faith Inclusion Network (FIN) in Hampton Roads, Virginia. In this post, she shares the joy she experienced when her daughter Samantha, who lives with autism, participated in confirmation at their church.

The Joy of Special Needs Inclusion

As the director of Faith Inclusion Network and parish advocate for persons with disabilities at Blessed Sacrament Church, I felt a strong obligation to ensure that my daughter participated in the rite of Confirmation. After all, my thoughts chided me, if I could not help make this happen with the advocacy experience I have attained in the past several years, then who could?

I shared my concern with Anne Masters, a guest speaker at a recent FIN event. “What if Samantha refuses to go up front? What if, for some reason I can’t determine, she gets upset and we have to leave? What if…What if…What if?”

But even as Anne assured me that everything would be okay, another answer came to me. It was not about what I had done or not done to help prepare Samantha for this sacrament and it wasn’t for me to worry about. The Holy Spirit would be with us. Her participation in the mass was about Samantha and our almighty and loving God.

So I prayed for God to ease my anxiety and on a beautiful, sunny Sunday afternoon in April we made our way to Holy Trinity Church to participate in the mass. When we arrived, a full 30 minutes early as instructed, I tried to remain calm. All the students and their sponsors were directed to the pastoral center to get ready to line up and receive last minute instructions.

“Oh no,” I thought. “We have never been in this building.” In preparation, I had brought Samantha to visit the chapel several times, but we had never been across the street. But Samantha held my hand and bravely went into this new site with no problem at all, though she is usually very anxious in new places.

Samantha’s sponsor, Jackie, had not arrived yet but her catechist, Derek, greeted Samantha and I with big hugs and words of encouragement. We were also warmly greeted by Sr. Regina, which made it seem we had come full circle, since she was the religious education director and the first person we met at Blessed Sacrament those many years ago. Sr. Regina would later hug me in the church and comment, “We did it!”

Jackie arrived just in time for a quick photo and to line up. We decided that although parents did not usually accompany the students and sponsors into the church, Samantha would be more comfortable with me there. And so we all walked out of the pastoral center, across the street, and toward the chapel.

We were surprised when Monsignor Mark Lane, who was presiding over the Mass, stopped us and the entire line. He held Samantha’s hand to introduce himself. I was touched that the Monsignor had not only taken a moment to greet Samantha but also had spent time learning about her. My confidence soared as we continued into the church.

I would like to report that all went smoothly during the 90-minute Mass, but we did have some tense moments. As the homily went on, Samantha began to get a bit restless and agitated. Jackie pulled out some gum and Samantha chomped through four pieces while I prayed, “Please help us through the homily, Lord.”

It was finally time to go up for the anointing with oil. Samantha waited patiently for her turn. When she approached the Monsignor, she became a little shy as if not sure she really trusted him to touch her forehead. But Monsignor Lane talked her through the process. I stood off to the side, trying to control the tears of happiness, pride, and love I felt.

We made our way back to our seats and I kept thinking, “Wow! We actually made it through the rite of Confirmation.” We still had to make it through the rest of the mass, but being familiar with all the regular mass order, Samantha seemed more relaxed.

The mass ended and it was time for photos. At first I thought, “Samantha is not going to tolerate this, she is ready to leave”, but she surprised me. We followed the Blessed Sacrament group up to the altar and took a photo. My mind exploded with the thought, “If there is anything that is the exact opposite of exclusion it is this; fully included, participating with her peers, accepted as member of the church, one of the body of Christ.”

8 years ago, we tentatively stepped into Blessed Sacrament Church, unsure of being accepted or of how to educate Samantha, a child with autism. With much support from our parish, hard work on the part of Samantha, myself, and many others, Samantha was included in this holy sacrament of the Catholic Church. It was not always easy and there were certainly a lot of bumps along the way but this day we experienced the joy of inclusion. I pray that, as the faith and disabilities movement moves throughout our country, ours will become a common story, and that the joy of inclusion can be experienced by all. Thanks be to God!

Special Needs Inclusion Joy at Your House?

Have you experienced the joy of special needs inclusion on behalf of your child? We’d love to hear about it. Share your story in the comment box if you like.

Do you like what you see at DifferentDream.com? You can receive more great content by subscribing to the quarterly Different Dream newsletter and signing up for the daily RSS feed delivered to your email inbox. You can sign up for the first in the pop-up box and the second at the bottom of this page.

Special needs inclusion became joy to guest blogger Karen Jackson as her child who lives with autism participated in the rite of confirmation at her church.

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Karen Jackson is the Executive Director of Faith Inclusion Network (FIN) of Hampton Roads where she lives with her husband and three children in Norfolk, VA. She is also the author of Loving Samantha. You can connect with Karen at the Faith Inclusion Network page.