Our Shaker Broom

Our Shaker Broom

by | Jul 29, 2011 | Out and About

Earlier this month, Hiram and I visited Shaker Village at Pleasant Hill, Kentucky. We had a wonderful time, though their “form follows function” philosophy and 30,000 perfectly placed wall pegs stirred up OCD tendencies that had lain dormant for years. Since the celebration of our anniversary was the reason we lingered in Kentucky after I spoke at a conference in Lexington, we wanted to select the perfect souvenir.

Something special.
Something really, really special.
You know, something that would evoke memories of our romantic get away.
Like a…
Like a…
handmade Shaker broom.

Bet that’s the first thing you thought of, huh? Now, I could make a bunch of excuses concerning our choice:

  • The toothless, stereotypical Kentucky craftsman in the broom shop was a relentless salesman who twisted our arms until we caved and bought the broom.
  • I have been pining for a Shaker broom for decades.
  • We were heavily influenced by the media blitz around the premier of the last Harry Potter movie.
  • We have so many knick knacks that a functional souvenir appealed to us.
  • I’m too cheap to buy something unless we really need it

Ding, ding, ding!The last excuse is the reason we bought the broom,
which is why that excuse has a ring of truth,
hits home,
fits us to a tee,
hits the nail on the head,
or whatever idiom you choose to describe us.

I like to say that the last excuse stands on it’s merits. Because that idiom brings to mind our Shaker broom, which the toothless, stereotypical Kentucky craftsman in the broom shop said should stand on its own.

And it does.

Which makes me think the toothless, stereotypical Kentucky craftsman was a better salesman than this gullible, stereotypical midwestern couple made him out to be. We’ll probably think of him every time we use our Shaker broom. And since the guy said the broom would last twenty years or more, we’ll be thinking about him pretty often.

How romantic.

Keep Your Children Off the Baggage Carousel

Keep Your Children Off the Baggage Carousel

by | Jul 20, 2011 | Out and About

After an entertaining and/or character building (depending on your perspective), virtually un-re-create-able travel adventure, we are finally home.

Hallelujah!

Perhaps the deer that darted onto the busy highway between Sand Point and Coeur d’Alene in front of our driver’s car was an omen. But since the car missed the deer or the deer missed the car (depending on your perspective), we blithely continued onto the Spokane airport and arrived there with time to check in and eat lunch. We even snagged a free pizza since whoever ordered before us never picked up theirs.

Buoyed with the anticipation of snarfing down free pizza once we landed in Denver and ran to catch our connecting flight, we blithely walked to the gate and waited to board our Southwest Airline flight to Denver. Maybe strange overhead announcements were an omen of what lay ahead, but we and the other passengers only laughed harder as the warnings progressed:

ANNOUNCEMENT #1: It is against safety regulations to allow children to sit on the edge of a baggage carousel. Please do not allow children to sit on the edge of Baggage Carousel #2.

ANNOUNCEMENT #2: It is against federal safety regulations for children to sit on the edge of a baggage carousel. When it starts moving, they could be injured. Parents, be sure your children are not sitting on the edge of Baggage Carousel #2.

ANNOUNCEMENT #3: This is the third warning about allowing children to sit on the edge of the baggage carousel. It will start moving in 2 minutes, and they could tip onto the carousel or lose fingers when it starts moving. Please remove your children from the edge of the baggage carousel immediately.

ANNOUNCEMENT #4: Parents, this is your third warning. (Apparently, the announcement maker had lost count.) Get your children off the edge of the baggage carousel immediately. The luggage will be arriving soon. Remove your children immediately.

We were still chuckling about the announcement 2 hours later on our approach to Denver, but the laughter dried up when the pilot mumbled, “The Denver airport is closed due to a severe thunderstorm, and we’re being rerouted to Amarillo, Texas.”

Amarillo, Texas?

No one was laughing fifty-five minutes later when we landed in Amarillo. No one laughed when the pilot continued his mumbling. “The storm has moved out of Denver, so we’ll get gas and go back. All your connecting flights have been delayed, so there’s a good chance you’ll be able to make them.”

Hallelujah!

Except that half of the 200+ passengers were in line to use the 2 tiny airport potties, and  the good news went right over our heads. The other half were staring out the windows at the oddest looking aircraft we’d ever seen.

“Looks like a dolphin,” said the young woman next to me. “And it has NASA printed on it.”

“Or it could be Shamu,” I suggested. “Who knew there was a Sea World on the Amarillo, Texas airport? Or we’ve been rerouted to a hush, hush NASA site for flight training.”

Pretty soon, we were on our way and arrived in Denver just in time to board our connecting flight to Omaha, snarfing free pizza as we ran.

Hallelujah!

That flight was uneventful, as was our late night drive home and our arrival at 3:30 AM. We were asleep in our beds by 4:00 AM. Our luggage, which did not make the connecting flight is supposed to arrive tomorrow. And I cleared up the NASA Shamu mystery with a little online research. It revealed that our NASA Shamu is really a NASA Super Guppy. Which leaves only two loose ends to wrap up right here, right now.

To the person who ordered and forgot to pick up the Hawaiian pizza at the Dave’s House of Pizza Kiosk: It was delicious. Thank you so much for sharing your supper with us.

To anyone who was in the vicinity of Spokane Airport’s baggage claim area between 2 and 4 on Tuesday afternoon: If you know what happened to the kids on Baggage Carousel #2, please leave a comment. We could use some closure and a final hallelujah!

The Shakers and OCD Me

The Shakers and OCD Me

by | Jul 12, 2011 | Out and About

Home, sweet home looked pretty good last night, after a 12 hour return trip from Kentucky. But the sticky air that greeted us felt terrible, much muggier and hotter than what we’d experienced during our short sojourn down south.

Apparently the top notch workmanship on display throughout the restored Shaker buildings, their furniture, and other products extends into the realm of climate control, too. Either that or God blessed our anniversary weekend with better-than-expected weather.  Whatever the case, our two days exploring every path, visiting every building and museum, following our tour guides, asking questions of the craftsmen, and enjoying the restaurant were delightful.

The Shakers were a sect that considered the Bible their sacred text, but didn’t believe Jesus was God until later in his life. Other beliefs included work as worship in daily life, efficiency and functionality in daily life, and ecstatic Sunday worship. To read more about their beliefs and a fairly complete history here.

My favorite building at Shaker Village of Pleasant Hill was the Meeting House, a 64 foot long structure with no supporting pillars in the center of the room – very important for that ecstatic Sunday morning worship – and the guide took us into the attic so we could see how the beams were constructed to accomplish this feat. I nodded knowingly during the explanation, but haven’t got a clue about what she was saying. But her dress was pretty.

The construction, however, is not what made this my favorite building. The neat rows of pegs made this my favorite building. Don’t get me wrong. Every wall of every room in every Shaker buildings has a row of pegs. (One guide says the combined total of pegs in the village was 30,000.) Not only that, but every candle rack on every wall of every room in every Shaker building has three equally spaced holes so the height of the stands are adjustable. Talk about function, efficiency and order!

But the Meeting House had them all beat. Because every wall in that huge place had three – count ‘em – three rows of pegs marching around the room. I tell you, it calmed the teeny-tiny OCD portion of my brain to see those perfectly straight rows of perfectly straight pegs as far as the eye can see. If it weren’t for the Shakers’ unbiblical view of Christ, their vow of celibacy and the fact that the sect is down 3 members living in Sabbathday Lake, Maine – those pegs might have hooked me in but good. All I can say is it’s a good thing the OCD detective Adrian Monk never visited the Shakers.

He’da been a gonner for sure.

Almost Royalty

Almost Royalty

by | Jul 8, 2011 | Out and About

Whew, Hiram and I are finally on the back side of yesterday’s CMX Children’s Ministry Conference in Lexington, Kentucky. We’ve checked out of the fancy-smancy hotel connected to the convention center. You know, the kind of place that draws you in with a half-price conference room rate and then proceeds to charge $14.99 for their buffet breakfast and $9.99 for internet in your hotel room.

Needless to say these two Iowa hicks, one of whom has Hess blood (read that as cheap, cheap, cheap) flowing through her veins, walked elsewhere for breakfast,  (Note: If you’re ever in Lexington, do not eat at Panera knock-off Atlanta Bread. The only things it has in common with Panera are the font on their logo and brown napkins.) and they only used the free internet in the hotel lobby. That explains the lack of a post yesterday.

This morning, we’re sitting in a real Panera – my choice for wi-fi home away from home – wiping our dainty little mouths with genuine brown paper napkins, enjoying a second copy of coffee and watching it rain. Life is good, good, good again.

So far the highlight of the trip – other than connecting with parents, children’s ministry leaders, and special needs ministry folks who were as dedicated and visionary as any I’ve ever met – was our overnight stop in Urbana, Illinois Tuesday night. Not only was it cheaper than our Lexington digs (We had a two room suite, free internet in our suite, and a complimentary hot breakfast), the clerk at the check-in desk knew how to spell “Philo.”

“Oh yes, Philo like the street,” she said. Noting our amazed expressions, she gave us directions to our namesake. We used them on the way out of town Wednesday (after our free and hearty hot breakfast) to find our road.

Philo Road turned out to be a fairly major thoroughfare. We took some pictures to add to our Philo memorabilia – well actually to start our collection of Philo memorabilia – before hitting the road and gloating over our new found fame. Other than Washington, Cunningham, Iowa, and a bunch of other street names I can’t recall, very few people have an almost major road in Urbana, Illinois named after them.

But the Philos do. And let me tell, you that was reassurance we needed after checking into our fancy-smancy Lexington hotel. The memory of our namesake gave us dignity and fortitude as we nickel and dimed our way past $14.99 breakfasts and $9.99 internet. We may be cheap, but we’re almost royalty.

Go ahead and bow. We won’t mind.

Coffee Club Update – Recycled

Coffee Club Update – Recycled

by | Jun 15, 2011 | Out and About

This week’s look back in the archives comes from June of 2009. I wrote it after Mom and I took a quick road trip to the town where she taught school for over 30 years, the town where I grew up. Two years have passed, and I’m even older enough to be a grandma, but our kids have not yet added that role to my job description. Since I still feel too young for the job, I’m really and truly okay with that!

 Coffee Club Update

Mom and I have returned from our travels. In our 36 hours away from home the grass grew exponentially, much to Hiram’s chagrin, and the weeds did, too. Mom went to bed early and slept in late, and this morning she mentioned again how much she enjoyed the trip.

The highlight of the excursion was the impromptu coffee my Aunt Donna (second from the right) hosted. Our former neighbors dropped what they were doing when they heard their former neighbor (third from the right) was in town and stopped in for a lovely chat. Not only was Mom their neighbor, she taught most of their children. She’s now completely up to date on the lives of her former students, their children, and in some cases, their children’s children.

I am still in shock over the update, since many of Mom’s former students are my contemporaries. So how can they be grandparents already? I mean, I understand the mechanics involved. But are these people, my age and younger, old enough to be grandparents of children in high school?

A good look at the women who attended yesterday’s coffee reveals the truth. We’re all old enough to be grandparents, and some are old enough to be great-grandparents. But Mom, bless her heart, did not complain about the dearth of great-grandchildren in her family quiver.

And to make things perfectly clear to my own children, I am not complaining about my empty quiver, either. No need to rush on my account. I’m in for the long haul, ready to wait until you are ready for the joys and responsibilities of parenting.

Until that day comes, I’ll keep pretending I’m not old enough to be a grandparent. Denial is a wonderful thing.

Gathering Moss for the Road

Gathering Moss for the Road

by | May 13, 2011 | Out and About

This week has been a memorable one. Even though I’m closing in on fifty-five and can’t remember nearly as much as in my whipper snapper days, it’s kind of hard to forget…

  • Sitting through your first tornado warning at the Guthrie Theater in Minneapolis.
  • Zipping through the Twin Cities on confusing freeways and arriving at the destination on time and in one piece.
  • Pleading my case with a Costco service manager and walking away satisfied.
  • Seeing two dear college friends for the first time in too many years.
  • Driving home through a dizzying variety of weather – heavy rain and cold temperatures, gloomy skies and moderate temperatures, clear skies and stifling temperatures.

But there are memories yet to come in this busy week. Tomorrow our daughter graduates from Northwester College in Orange City, Iowa. So in a few hours Hiram and I are driving that direction. To get ready for the big occasion, I have…

  • Unpacked and repacked.
  • Gone grocery shopping for a meal at my cousin’s house after graduation.
  • Done the prep work for the tapioca fruit salad Anne requested be part of the meal.
  • Made a German chocolate cake to celebrate our son’s May 23rd birthday, since he and our new daughter will be at graduation, too.
  • Stared at the wall trying to decide what day it is. Oh yeah, Friday the 13th.

This rolling stone’s aging body wants to stay home, but not as much as her mind wants to join the family to celebrate our daughter’s accomplishment. But before we leave this afternoon, me and the hubby will take a short nap.

Old stones roll a little easier once they gather a little moss for the road.