I consider myself young at heart, though periodic mailings from AARP, the ones urging my husband and me to join their fine organization make it mighty difficult to ignore the fact that we’re getting older every day.
Even so, for years we scoffed when the envelopes arrived. We’re not old enough, we told each other. We’re too young. Way too young. But recent events, ugly heads reared and teeth snapping, make it hard to keep the denial thing going. Here are the top ten signs we are indeed old enough to join AARP. (Not that we’re going to indulge, mind you. We’re way too young for that.)
10. You’re the same age you’re parents were when you thought their lives were toast. Now you know this is the age when life starts cooking.
9. You watch The Best of the Smothers Brother DVD and realize Tom and Dick are just a couple kids, not the sophisticated adults you thought they were when the show aired in the late 1960s. But in the recent interviews included in the bonus material, they look old. Kinda like you.
8. You strike up the a conversation with the old person in line behind you at the grocery store and discover you both graduated from high school the same year.
7. You reject 95% of the latest fashions considered cute by the younger gens as stupid, not cute.
6. You reject 4 of the 5% you consider cute because they look uncomfortable.
5. The remaining 1% you consider cute and comfortable go out of fashion before you make up your mind to make a purchase.
4. You can’t remember if you put the muffins in the microwave or if your spouse did.
3. You can’t remember if you ate the muffins in the microwave or if your spouse did.
2. Your oldest child is about to turn 30. He was born when you were 25.
1. 70 sounds young. Very young. Very, very young.
Anybody else brave enough to ‘fess up recent signs of aging? Leave a comment!
