One of my high school English teachers was big on vocabulary. Even in his composition class for college bound seniors, all of us full of ourselves and sure we had the world by the tail, he pinned five new words on the board every day, Monday through Thursday. On Friday, he quizzed us on the meanings and spellings of our twenty new words, whether we liked it or not.
Lately, I feel like I’m back in school for a vocabulary refresher course. Only this time, it’s one word day after day – dependent. And I’m not being quizzed on spelling and meaning, but on the application of the word in my spiritual life.
The refresher course began a few weeks ago when I started reading Randy Alcorn’s book, If God Is Good: Faith in the Midst of Suffering and Evil. It’s part of the research for my new book. Alcorn explains over and over why we can trust God in the face of suffering, why he is trustworthy, what he has done to prove himself so. The more I read, the more I understand that trusting God is an admission of his strength and my weakness. Which makes me dependent upon him.
The next lesson came at Thanksgiving, when I was pulled Walking on Water: Reflections on Faith and Art by Madeleine L’Engle off the bookshelf at my daughter and new son’s house. (She’s the author of A Wrinkle in Time, one of the best young adult novels ever.) In the books, she shares her thoughts on what it means to be a Christian artist. Over and over she talks about being dependent on God.
Then on Saturday, I wrote the rough draft of the next chapter of my book. The title assigned to the chapter in the outline written last spring was Dependent Advocate. On Sunday our pastor, who is working his way through a sermon series our church’s core values, tackled the one called Utter Dependence. And since I’m teaching an adult Sunday school class called Sermon Reflections, guess what the topic of my morning Bible study is this week? Dependence.
Though I’m not always quick on the uptake, I do notice when someone repeatedly hammers me on the head. So I’m shivering in my boots, wondering why God has selected “dependence” as my word of the week, day, hour, and minute.
Why is he calling me to meditate on dependence?
What temptation lies ahead, luring me to think I can go it alone?
What experience awaits, requiring the admission of my dependence on God?
How will I live dependently today?
How should I pray?
