For all of them were trying to frighten us, thinking,
“They will become discouraged with the work and it will not be done.”
But now, O God, strengthen my hands.
Nehemiah 6:9
These days, I don’t have much to complain about. The kids are married and doing well. Mom’s settled comfortably into life at my brother’s house, as has our nervous, yippy old dog. Hiram loves his job. My book is selling reasonably well, and I’m making steady progress on the next one. Our new church building is nearing completion, thanks to the help of many volunteers. The weather is absolutely gorgeous.
With all those blessings, you’d think I’d be competing with Pollyanna in the sweetness and light department. Instead, I’ve been walking around in a cloud of discouragement that makes Eeyore look like an optimist.
One step into the new church, and I’m paralyzed by the amount of work yet to be done. One look at the day’s to do list, and I’m overwhelmed by what won’t be accomplished. One favor requested by a friend or colleague, and I’m resentful about the demands on my time. One mention of a problem, and I’m instantly casting blame instead of seeking solutions.
One recent morning I was on such a downer, the nasty voice in my head so persistent, even I didn’t want to be with me. I ordered myself to snap out of it. Nothing happened. I prayed for God to change my heart. Nothing happened. I quoted II Timothy 10:5. Lord, take my every thought captive to the obedience of Christ. Nothing happened. I confessed my sin. Nothing happened. So I gave up and told God I was a hopeless mess.
Suddenly, the battle scenes in The Chronicles of Narnia came to mind and a thought formed. You’re fighting a spiritual battle. Someone wants to stop you. As quickly as the thought came, it vanished.
Puzzled, I started on my to do list. The first item was a phone call to a stranger. To a a stranger who’s an expert. To a stranger who’s an expert and very busy. I dialed, trying to ignore the nasty voice in my head. What do you think you’re doing thinking calling her and imposing on her time?
She answered the phone, and before I could say hello she spoke.“I love your book. Keep writing.”
The nasty voice inside my head choked. A few minutes into the phone conversation, it died completely. The battle was won. The peace was exquisite. The hope was sufficient.
When the phone conversation ended, I hung up and breathed a prayer. Oh God, strengthen my hands for the next battle to come.
