Stress is a component of the parenting process. The stress is often compounded for parents of children with special needs. A featured post at Julia Robert’s blog Support for Special Needs recently addressed the subject.

Overwhelming Stress

The post was written by Robert Rummel-Hudson, father of a daughter with special needs. (He also blogs at Fighting Monsters with Rubber Swords—a great title for a special needs parenting blog.) In the post, he talks about Veronica Galbraith, “a single mother of a teenaged boy with Autism in the UK  who committed suicide after she was compelled to put her son into care when she found herself unable to cope with his behavioral issues.”

External Stress of Caring for a Child with Special Needs

He goes on to analyze the external and internal stresses Veronica and every parent caring for a child with special needs faces. He says, “These external stressors aren’t mitigating circumstances. They aren’t beside the point. They ARE the point…We don’t spend every minute of every day dealing with disability challenges, but because those challenges are omnipresent, we are always special needs parents, regardless of whether the monster is driving at that particular moment or not.”

Stress You Can’t Handle

He conclude the article with this observation:

When I read the story of someone like Veronica Galbraith, I don’t wonder if she got it wrong more than she got it right, but rather if she BELIEVED she got it wrong too much. And I realize, and remind myself when necessary, that the secret to successful parenting isn’t just about educating yourself, or listening closely to what your kids are trying to tell you, or fighting the good fight like a steely-eyed warrior. Those are vital points, to be sure. But none of that happens if you lose heart, or if you convince yourself that you really can’t show up for work the next morning.

There’s a saying that every special needs parent has heard at some point, rivaling the Holland Thing for frequency of appearance in our inbox. “God never gives you more than you can handle.” But we know better. Sometimes he does.

The article is thought-provoking and worth a thorough read. So buzz on over to Support for Special Needs for a closer look.

How Do You Handle the Stress You Can’t Handle?

The post made me thankful for the support system around us when our son was very sick, and it makes me thankful for my faith, too. Because I agree with Rummel-Hudson. God does give people more than they can handle. But my faith says he doesn’t want them to commit suicide. He wants them to see their need for him and trust him to handle it.

That’s how I got through the dark days and years with our son. How about you? How do you handle the stress you can’t handle? What support do you need? Leave a comment.

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Photo by Jeremy Bishop on Unsplash