Free as a Bird
I’m free as a bird this morning, thanks to our son. I called him yesterday to finalize plans for the Labor Day Family Reunion which will be at our house. Near the end of our conversation, he said he was making a list of everything that could possibly go wrong this weekend and worrying about it for me. That, and a box of fresh sweet corn from the organic farm where he works, would be his contribution for the weekend.
“I hadn’t even started worrying,” I told him. “My plan was to have fun and not worry.”
“Exactly,” he agreed, “and thanks to me, you can let your worries go completely.”
“What worries?” I asked.
“All sorts of things,” he said. “I’m worrying about falling limbs, so you don’t have to. And polyester. You don’t have to worry about polyester at all. I’m taking care of that along with fear of nuclear attack.” He listed several more items I can’t remember. They were all pretty random, far beyond my normal worry zone.
As he talked, the more potential worries surfaced. “Would you like to talk to your father?” I bailed and handed the phone to Hiram. “He’s doing all the worrying about the weekend for us,” I whispered. “Ask him about polyester.”
A few minutes later, Hiram hung up. “Allen said we don’t have to worry about cat AIDS because he’s taking care of that.” He looked dazed. “At first I thought Allen said ‘cat eggs,’ and asked him what cat eggs were. He said, ‘No, cat AIDS, but I’ll worry about cat eggs for you, too. Don’t think about it ever again.’”
So until after Labor Day, Hiram and I are not worrying one iota about falling limbs, nuclear attack, cat eggs, cat AIDS, or polyester. But we’re not calling our son again this week. We don’t want to know about the dangers posed by aluminum foil, ranch dressing, tree frogs, or anything else on his worry list.
Allen volunteered for this duty. He can have it. In the meantime, we’re free as birds and lovin’ it.
