Ba-dum-bum.
Spoiler alert for those who’ve not yet watched episode 2 of the third season of Downton Abbey! Wait to read this until after you’ve watched it.
For those of you who have watched episode 3, at least the women readers, could you believe what happened to Lady Edith? Is this woman doomed to always be the bridesmaid, but never the bride? Only since Lady Sybil eloped and Lady Mary didn’t bother with bridesmaids, Lady Edith never got to be a bridesmaid, either.
And she was jilted at the altar.
In a gown I personally considered more beautiful than Lady Mary’s. And I’m quite the expert on wedding dresses, having spent a considerable amount of my childhood rating wedding gowns worn by my older cousins. I also rated the bridesmaid dresses, wedding programs, embossed napkins, cake, mints, mixed nuts, and the frilly net aprons worn by the young teens who helped serve. Over the years, I kept careful track of which cousins were asked to be bridesmaids, groomsmen, ring bearers and flower girls.
Which brings me back to Downton Abbey and poor Lady Edith.
I know how she felt. I totally understand why she ripped off the veil and threw it over the railing. (Didn’t you just love its romantic and tragic billow to earth?) I understand why she threw the headpiece on the floor, refused supper, moped all night, and rose in the morning determined to be the best spinster ever. How, you might ask, can I understand?
Because I never got to be a flower girl.
My sister did, and her middle name is guess what? Mary. Sure, she let me wear her gown when we played dress up, but it wasn’t the same. Not only that, but my brother got to be a ring bearer. But no matter how winsome and irresistible I acted when the latest bride and groom-to-be stopped by to visit–kinda like Lady Edith acted around Sir Anthony Strallan–I never got the flower girl nod.
Never. Ever. Not once.
But like, Edith, I’ve decided to stop moping. Instead, I’m working on my accent and posture, adding to my matching hat and gown collection, learning wield a walking stick with an imposing air, and perfecting the art of leveling pointed looks at one and all.
Watch out Dowager Countess of Grantham, your competition is on the move!
