{"id":9941,"date":"2014-04-28T07:00:31","date_gmt":"2014-04-28T12:00:31","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/f06.70c.myftpupload.com\/?p=9941"},"modified":"2014-04-28T07:00:31","modified_gmt":"2014-04-28T12:00:31","slug":"7-unspoken-realities-of-special-needs-parenting","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/jolenephilo.com\/staging\/7-unspoken-realities-of-special-needs-parenting\/","title":{"rendered":"7 Unspoken Realities of Special Needs Parenting"},"content":{"rendered":"\n[et_pb_section fb_built=”1″ fullwidth=”on” _builder_version=”4.4.2″ global_colors_info=”{}”][et_pb_fullwidth_post_title featured_image=”off” _builder_version=”4.4.2″ title_font=”||||||||” title_text_color=”#42313A” title_font_size=”40px” meta_font_size=”14px” background_color=”#B4DBC0″ custom_padding=”50px||50px||false|false” global_colors_info=”{}”][\/et_pb_fullwidth_post_title][\/et_pb_section][et_pb_section fb_built=”1″ specialty=”on” _builder_version=”4.4.2″ custom_padding=”0px||0px|||” global_colors_info=”{}”][et_pb_column type=”3_4″ specialty_columns=”3″ _builder_version=”3.25″ custom_padding=”|||” global_colors_info=”{}” custom_padding__hover=”|||”][et_pb_row_inner _builder_version=”4.4.2″ global_colors_info=”{}”][et_pb_column_inner saved_specialty_column_type=”3_4″ _builder_version=”4.4.2″ global_colors_info=”{}”][et_pb_image src=”@ET-DC@eyJkeW5hbWljIjp0cnVlLCJjb250ZW50IjoicG9zdF9mZWF0dXJlZF9pbWFnZSIsInNldHRpbmdzIjp7fX0=@” align=”center” _builder_version=”4.4.3″ _dynamic_attributes=”src” global_colors_info=”{}”][\/et_pb_image][et_pb_text _builder_version=”4.10.5″ global_colors_info=”{}”]

Photo Credit: imagerymajestic www.freedigitalphotos.net<\/span><\/p>\n

Raising kids with special needs is full of surprising realities. Realities not often shared with other families because parents don’t want to sound whiny or complaining. But by avoiding that trap, we often fall into a different trap. A trap of isolation created by our lack of communication. So I was really happy to find a post by Michele Cushatt<\/a><\/span>. She’s wife to 1, mom to 6, a speaker, and writer. Three of their children are adopted and deal with Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD)<\/a><\/span>.<\/p>\n

7 Unspoken Realities of Special Needs Parenting<\/h3>\n

In a post at her blog, Michele speaks out about 7 special needs parenting realities. Here’s a summary of what she said:<\/p>\n

    \n
  1. We’re not snubbing you.<\/strong> It’s just that each day is an effort at survival. Please.<\/em> Don\u2019t give up on us.<\/li>\n
  2. We don\u2019t always know how to ask for help.<\/strong> Special needs families deal with big needs, maybe impossible ones. They appreciate it when you ask to help, but we’re not likely to ask you to take on needs like that.<\/li>\n
  3. Our kids aren\u2019t like your kids.<\/strong> Don\u2019t assume our kids are the same just because your son screamed in the grocery store once. We have meltdowns almost every day. Saying \u201call kids do that\u201d invalidates our reality.
    <\/span><\/li>\n
  4. We don\u2019t need your parenting advice.<\/strong> Maybe we do, but save it for a different time, okay? We don\u2019t need you to fix us. We need you to be <\/em><\/span>with us<\/em>.
    <\/span><\/li>\n
  5. Support services are more imaginary than real.<\/strong> There’s often a great chasm between the discussion of support services and the provision of them. We often feel quite alone when we bring our children home.<\/li>\n
  6. Some days we want to run away.<\/strong> Some days we need to mourn what\u2019s been lost. We need you to listen without judgment.<\/li>\n
  7. We\u2019d do it all over again.<\/strong> Though you\u2019ve seen our tears and frustration, we would do it all over again. It’s worth it.<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

    The complete article can be found at What Parents of Special Needs Kids Need You to Know<\/a><\/span>.<\/p>\n

    What Do You Want Other Families to Know?<\/h3>\n

    What other unspoken realities do you want others to know? Now’s your chance to speak out. Share them in the comment box.<\/p>\n

    Do you like what you see at DifferentDream.com? You can receive more great content by subscribing to the quarterly Different Dream newsletter and signing up for the daily RSS feed delivered to your email inbox. You can sign up for the first in the pop up box and the second at the bottom of this page.<\/em><\/p>[\/et_pb_text][\/et_pb_column_inner][\/et_pb_row_inner][et_pb_row_inner _builder_version=”4.4.2″ global_colors_info=”{}”][et_pb_column_inner saved_specialty_column_type=”3_4″ _builder_version=”4.4.2″ background_color=”#b4dbc0″ custom_padding=”20px|20px|20px|20px|false|false” global_colors_info=”{}”][et_pb_blurb title=”@ET-DC@eyJkeW5hbWljIjp0cnVlLCJjb250ZW50IjoicG9zdF9hdXRob3IiLCJzZXR0aW5ncyI6eyJiZWZvcmUiOiJCeSAiLCJhZnRlciI6IiIsIm5hbWVfZm9ybWF0IjoiZGlzcGxheV9uYW1lIiwibGluayI6Im9uIiwibGlua19kZXN0aW5hdGlvbiI6ImF1dGhvcl9hcmNoaXZlIn19@” image=”@ET-DC@eyJkeW5hbWljIjp0cnVlLCJjb250ZW50IjoicG9zdF9hdXRob3JfcHJvZmlsZV9waWN0dXJlIiwic2V0dGluZ3MiOnt9fQ==@” icon_placement=”left” image_max_width=”100px” content_max_width=”800px” _builder_version=”4.4.2″ _dynamic_attributes=”image,title” header_font=”Rubik|500|||||||” header_text_color=”#44465f” header_font_size=”14px” header_line_height=”32px” body_font=”Rubik||||||||” body_text_color=”rgba(0,6,69,0.6)” body_link_text_color=”#ffffff” custom_css_main_element=”font-weight: 400;” border_radii_image=”on|100px|100px|100px|100px” border_color_all_image=”#ffffff” box_shadow_style_image=”preset1″ box_shadow_vertical_image=”20px” box_shadow_blur_image=”40px” box_shadow_color_image=”rgba(68,70,95,0.27)” locked=”off” global_colors_info=”{}”]

    Jolene Philo is the author of the\u00a0Different Dream\u00a0series for parents of kids with special needs. She speaks at parenting and special needs conferences around the country. She\u2019s also the creator and host of the\u00a0Different Dream website.\u00a0Sharing Love Abundantly With Special Needs Families: The 5 Love Languages\u00ae for Parents Raising\u00a0Children with Disabilities<\/a>, which she co-authored with Dr. Gary Chapman, was released in August of 2019 and is available at local bookstores, their bookstore website, and\u00a0at Amazon. The first book in her cozy mystery series, See Jane Run!<\/em>, features people with disabilities and will be released in June of 2022.<\/p>[\/et_pb_blurb][\/et_pb_column_inner][\/et_pb_row_inner][et_pb_row_inner _builder_version=”4.4.2″ global_colors_info=”{}”][et_pb_column_inner saved_specialty_column_type=”3_4″ _builder_version=”4.4.2″ global_colors_info=”{}”][et_pb_comments _builder_version=”4.4.2″ custom_button=”on” button_text_color=”#42313A” button_bg_color=”#EBDCB2″ global_colors_info=”{}”][\/et_pb_comments][\/et_pb_column_inner][\/et_pb_row_inner][\/et_pb_column][et_pb_column type=”1_4″ _builder_version=”3.25″ custom_padding=”|||” global_colors_info=”{}” custom_padding__hover=”|||”][et_pb_sidebar _builder_version=”4.4.2″ global_colors_info=”{}”][\/et_pb_sidebar][\/et_pb_column][\/et_pb_section][et_pb_section fb_built=”1″ _builder_version=”4.9.2″ use_background_color_gradient=”on” background_color_gradient_start=”#42313A” background_color_gradient_end=”#EBDCB2″ background_color_gradient_direction=”159deg” custom_padding=”0px|0px|0px|0px|false|false” border_width_all=”3px” border_color_all=”#1c1259″ saved_tabs=”all” global_colors_info=”{}”][et_pb_row column_structure=”1_2,1_2″ use_custom_gutter=”on” gutter_width=”1″ _builder_version=”4.9.2″ width=”100%” max_width=”100%” custom_margin=”||0px||false|false” custom_padding=”25px|0px|5px|0px|false|false” global_colors_info=”{}”][et_pb_column type=”1_2″ module_class=”horizontal_optin_column_1″ _builder_version=”4.3.4″ global_colors_info=”{}”][et_pb_text _builder_version=”4.4.2″ header_text_align=”right” header_text_color=”#45107a” header_3_font=”Dancing Script|700|||||||” header_3_text_align=”center” header_3_text_color=”#B4DBC0″ header_3_font_size=”45px” custom_margin=”10px||||false|false” custom_padding=”||||false|false” global_colors_info=”{}”]

    Subscribe for Updates from Jolene<\/h3>[\/et_pb_text][\/et_pb_column][et_pb_column type=”1_2″ _builder_version=”4.3.4″ global_colors_info=”{}”][et_pb_signup mailchimp_list=”JolenePhilo|89f719a52b” layout=”bottom_top” first_name_fullwidth=”off” last_name_field=”off” email_fullwidth=”off” module_class=”custom_emailoptin” _builder_version=”4.4.2″ form_field_focus_background_color=”#42313A” background_enable_color=”off” custom_button=”on” button_text_size=”16px” button_text_color=”#42313A” button_bg_color=”#B4DBC0″ button_border_width=”2px” button_border_radius=”0px” button_font=”|||on|||||” button_use_icon=”off” button_custom_margin=”5px||||false|false” button_custom_padding=”0px|0px|0px|0px|false|false” custom_padding=”0px|0px|0px|0px|false|false” border_width_all_fields=”2px” global_colors_info=”{}”][\/et_pb_signup][\/et_pb_column][\/et_pb_row][\/et_pb_section][et_pb_section fb_built=”1″ _builder_version=”4.4.2″ custom_padding=”0px|||||” global_colors_info=”{}”][et_pb_row _builder_version=”4.4.2″ global_colors_info=”{}”][et_pb_column type=”4_4″ _builder_version=”4.4.2″ global_colors_info=”{}”][et_pb_text _builder_version=”4.4.2″ header_font=”EB Garamond|600|||||||” header_text_color=”#B6452C” header_font_size=”50px” header_text_shadow_style=”preset1″ global_colors_info=”{}”]

    Related Posts<\/h1>[\/et_pb_text][\/et_pb_column][\/et_pb_row][et_pb_row _builder_version=”4.4.2″ global_colors_info=”{}”][et_pb_column type=”4_4″ _builder_version=”4.4.2″ global_colors_info=”{}”][et_pb_blog fullwidth=”off” posts_number=”3″ include_categories=”current” show_more=”on” _builder_version=”4.4.2″ header_text_color=”#42313A” meta_font=”||on||||||” read_more_font=”|||on|||||” read_more_text_color=”#B6452C” read_more_font_size=”12px” pagination_text_color=”#B6452C” pagination_font_size=”20px” global_colors_info=”{}”][\/et_pb_blog][\/et_pb_column][\/et_pb_row][\/et_pb_section]\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

    Raising kids with special needs is full of surprising realities that parents find hard to share. Here are 7 realities we want the general public to know.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":9942,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_et_pb_use_builder":"on","_et_pb_old_content":"[caption id=\"attachment_9942\" align=\"aligncenter\" width=\"300\"]\"Raising<\/a> Photo Credit: imagerymajestic www.freedigitalphotos.net<\/a>[\/caption]\n\nRaising kids with special needs is full of surprising realities. Realities not often shared with other families because parents don't want to sound whiny or complaining. But by avoiding that trap, we often fall into a different trap. A trap of isolation created by our lack of communication. So I was really happy to find a post by Michele Cushatt<\/a>. She's wife to 1, mom to 6, a speaker, and writer. 3 of their children are adopted who deal with Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD)<\/a>.\n

    7 Unspoken Realities of Special Needs Parenting<\/h3>\nIn a post at her blog, Michele speaks out about 7 special needs parenting realities. Here's a summary of what she said:\n
      \n \t
    1. We're not snubbing you.<\/strong> It's just that each day is an effort at survival. Please.<\/em> Don\u2019t give up on us.<\/li>\n \t
    2. We don\u2019t always know how to ask for help.<\/strong> Special needs families deal with big needs, maybe impossible ones. They appreciate it when you ask to help, but we're not likely to ask you to take on needs like that.<\/li>\n \t
    3. Our kids aren\u2019t like your kids.<\/strong> But don\u2019t assume our kids are the same just because your son screamed in the grocery store once. We have meltdowns almost every day. Saying \u201call kids do that\u201d invalidates our reality.\n<\/span><\/li>\n \t
    4. We don\u2019t need your parenting advice.<\/strong>\u00a0Maybe we do, but save it for a different time, okay? We don\u2019t need you to fix me. We need you to be <\/em><\/span>with us<\/em>.\n<\/span><\/li>\n \t
    5. Support services are more imaginary than real.<\/strong> There's often a great chasm between the discussion of support services and the provision of them. We often feel quite alone when we bring our children home.<\/li>\n \t
    6. Some days we want to run away.<\/strong> Some days we need to mourn what\u2019s been lost. We need you to listen without judgment.<\/li>\n \t
    7. We\u2019d do it all over again.<\/strong> Though you\u2019ve seen our tears and frustration, we would do it all over again. It's worth it.<\/li>\n<\/ol>\nThe complete article can be found at What Parents of Special Needs Kids Need You to Know<\/a>.\n

      What Do You Want Other Families to Know?<\/h3>\nWhat other unspoken realities do you want others to know? Now's your chance to speak out. Share them in the comment box.\n\nDo you like what you see at DifferentDream.com? You can receive more great content by subscribing to the quarterly Different Dream newsletter and signing up for the daily RSS feed delivered to your email inbox. You can sign up for the first in the pop up box and the second at the bottom of this page.<\/em>","_et_gb_content_width":"2880","footnotes":""},"categories":[3559,3574,3561],"tags":[3563,3831,3832],"class_list":["post-9941","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-different-dream","category-self-care-and-stress","category-special-needs-parenting","tag-communication","tag-michele-cushatt","tag-reactive-attachment-disorder"],"yoast_head":"\n7 Unspoken Realities of Special Needs Parenting - Jolene Philo Staging<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Raising kids with special needs is full of surprising realities that parents find hard to share. 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