{"id":1142,"date":"2010-08-03T20:35:53","date_gmt":"2010-08-03T20:35:53","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/jolene-test.com.bishopcompsol.com\/?p=1142"},"modified":"2010-08-03T20:35:53","modified_gmt":"2010-08-03T20:35:53","slug":"soggy-balls-litter-high-school-tennis-court","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/jolenephilo.com\/staging\/soggy-balls-litter-high-school-tennis-court\/","title":{"rendered":"Soggy Balls Litter High School Tennis Court"},"content":{"rendered":"

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Having reached the ripe, old age of fifty-four, I like to think age and experience have given me a wealth of common sense. Having learned a goodly number of life lessons the hard way, there are certain things I just don\u2019t do anymore because I know better.<\/p>\n

I know better than to don my swim suit and go boating in the heat of a bright, August day without slathering on the sunscreen. So could someone explain why I merely applied (as opposed to slathered) sunscreen Sunday afternoon? And could someone explain why I am now sporting the mother of all sunburns on parts of my anatomy which shall remain nameless?<\/p>\n

I also know better than to keep walking in the rain after the first flash of lightning, no matter how far away the lightning is. So could someone explain why, armed with my metal umbrella, I kept walking yesterday morning, even as the lightning flashed, albeit weakly? And could someone explain why I was three miles from home when the lightning picked up strength and I found myself uttering my most ridiculous prayer ever? Yes God, I\u2019ve always wanted curly hair, but not today. Not like this.<\/em><\/p>\n

Finally, after twenty-five years as an elementary teacher, I know better than to say any of the following to ten-year-olds in a recess line:<\/p>\n